I Just Called to Say…
In these economically harrowing times, I think we need to all be a little more positive, which is why we shouldn’t give Blagojevich such a hard time. Sure, the guy was caught on tape trying to sell Obama’s vacated Senate seat to the highest bidder. But what about all the conversations where he wasn’t trying to elicit bribes? I bet if you looked at all his phone calls, he’s only belligerent and threatening people in, like, 25 percent of them.
To illustrate the point, I was able to get my hands on a few Blago conversations I bet you haven’t heard. Here is one of him speaking with his daughter, Amy:
Blago: Hey pumpkin.
Amy: Hey daddy.
Blago: What did you do today at school?
Amy: I drew a picture of a unicorn.
Blago: I love unicorns!
Amy: Me too!
What a sweetheart. Or how about this one with his wife, Patricia:
Patricia: Hey dear, would you mind picking up some ice cream on the way home?
Blago: What kind?
Patricia: Hmm, Rocky Road.
Blago: Shoot, I’m at the store now, and they only have Chunky Monkey. You know what, I’ll just go to the place across the street. I know they have it.
How considerate!
Before we throw the book at the guy, just remember, his glass may be 25 percent full of pure evil, but it’s also 75 percent full of love. Lord knows we need more of that bleeping stuff.