Only In My Fantasies
Another football season done. Another disappointment. For the fifth year in a row, my fantasy football team will not be taking home any championship hardware. I have been to the Jetnuts-Fantasy-Football Superbowl three out of the previous four seasons but came up short in all. This year I didn’t even make the post-season.
I had it after last year’s loss in the finals. The team I assembled in 2007 was arguably the greatest in fantasy football history. The record setting pair of New England Patriots Tom Brady and Randy Moss led the way to a 13-1 regular season. But the list of superstars didn’t end there. Number one overall pick LaDainian Tomlinson led the rushing attack. Top-rated tight end Kellen Winslow sured up the lineup. I also had KC RB Larry Johnson and Chad “before I changed my name to “Ocho-Cinco” Johnson.
I had created a monster. A devastating machine that rolled through the regular season tearing teams apart and crushing owners hopes for playoff glory. The regular season was easy. The early rounds of playoffs a snap. But alas, all that talent couldn’t pull off the big win.
Again, I lost the Superbowl.
I had no choice but to rename my team. The team once known as the Movie-Reatrd (based upon my ridiculous knowledge of cinema trivia) has been renamed the 90’s Bills (referring to the great ability the Buffalo Bills had in the early 1990’s to reach the Superbowl only to be obliterated by whichever team was lucky enough to play them).
The 2008 incarnation of the 90’s Bills never even seemed to have a chance. My first round pick, 2007 MVP Tom Brady, was lost for the season in the very first week. I would have no choice but to turn the team over to Jet castoff Chad Pennington and rookie QB Joe Flacco. Things were bleak for the Bills and the season was lost or so I thought.
Something strange began to happen mid-season. I hadn’t realized it but somehow my undermanned team managed to compile points. A lot of points. Despite racking-up losses, I was also scoring enough total points to be in contention for the overall points title. It’s more of an honorary title even though their was a small prize allotted for winning that contest.
So my hopes at coming away with some sort of consolation came down to last Monday night. Panthers versus Buccaneers. I needed 16 points out of Panthers RB DeAngelo Williams against the highly rated Buc defense. In the end, Mr. Williams hit three milestones.
1) He broke the single game Panther rushing record- 186 yards.
2) He finished the season as the best RB in fantasy football – 207 points.
3) He won me the points title – $150
In the end, it wasn’t enough. I missed the playoffs. But I vow to you now I will return to my rightful place of finishing second. It’s a pity too and I’ll tell you why. I had the best team – again. I’m just bitter.

