A long post today, and I’m afraid I have to start off with a few disappointments:
Saw the film “Waltz With Bashir” yesterday. Borrrrrrrrrring. Got in a good 30-minute snooze, in fact. The animation is pretty awesome, though.
Watched the debut of “Sober House” on Thursday night. Also borrrrrrrrrrrrrrrring. As has been previously noted, I am a “Celebrity Rehab” addict, so I had high hopes for this latest spinoff from Dr. Drew. But it was thin gruel. I mean, come on people, an entire show spent agonizing over whether Steven, who showed up to the sober house high on heroin with needles and drug residue in his pants pockets, should be kicked out? Answer: YES. Let’s move on.
In fact, let’s move on to Miami Beach, where Maureen Dowd managed to get the New York Times to send her on a junket to the new Canyon Ranch. I am trying to decide whether I have ever in my life read a more absurd piece of “journalism,” not to mention one that was given lots of space and ink. The apparent rationale for Dowd’s visit with her friend “Alessandra,” (gee, I wonder which Alessandra that could be…) was to dig down and explore whether “spa guilt” is running rampant at a time “when America has undergone a transformation
into a place where vain fripperies and vulgar extravagances are met with a gimlet eye.”
To help answer this question, Alessandra puts herself through a $500 “body ritual” that she reports made her feel “like a fat Mafioso being serviced by Thai hookers.” Dowd herself enjoyed the “gorgeous shimmering mosaic designs, gentle lighting, sumptuous rooms, a sybaritic spa,” and the “delicious (if suspiciously salty-tasting) food, and raspberry-vodka-and-hibiscus-tea martinis.” She goes to a lecture called “Let Me See Your Tongue,” and confesses that, during meditation class, she finds herself reflecting on how she and Alessandra can go AWOL from the spa and take in some of Miami’s “sparkle.”
The answer, as it turns out, is that Dowd calls “the only person I knew in Miami” — who just so happens to be Police Chief John Timoney (who, you may recall, is not exactly a big fan of civil liberties and has a son who was busted for trying to buy 400 pounds of pot).
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